You gain a lot and then lose it all. Back and forth. Over and over again. It is a myriad of profound and then suddenly lost moments.
I believe perspective can only come when you finally decide to dig yourself out of that narcissistic hole you've so been so happily living in. It is that deep, dark place where all thoughts, moments and mirrors reflect only you and your plights.
My hole could easily consist of:
- homework assignments
- facial and body scrutiny
- over- analysis of past mistakes & situations
- negativity and self- doubt
- feeling disheartened
Until I read something about a fellow blogger. I met her while interning at FASHION. I always enjoyed walking over to her desk to give her products to shoot. She had an exceptional sense of personal style and she was quiet, but special in her own way. I will not reveal her strife for it is not my place, but I can say it is larger than frizzy hair and boys. So this is for Y if you're reading this, you're in my thoughts.
Now, I don't suddenly feel better because, "hey it could always be worse!" I dislike that motto. It's too soft and squishy for me. There are brave people out there who fight the hardest battles so instead I choose to ask myself:
"Is this really important?"
"Is this how I want to spend my energy and thoughts?"
It is about removing the haze that is clouding my vision with two fresh sprays of windshield wiper fluid. Once the wipers cut through the soft grime, the stark clearness of the view shocks my focus.
And I find clarity once again.