November 9, 2009


Go ahead and say it. I dare you. I double dare you. Use a word that drips with controversy. A word that is splashed across magazine covers, book covers and song lyrics.

Confidence |ˈkänfədəns; -fəˌdens|noun • a feeling of self-assurance arising from one's appreciation of one's own abilities or qualities.

We are told to be confident everyday from our parents, teachers, celebrities and mentors. The key to happiness and self-acceptance is confidence. Confident people get the job, the relationships and the success.

But to me confidence is easy to define but harder to achieve.

There is no step by step guide. The word is just thrust upon us.

Is confidence not caring about what others think? Is confidence standing up straight when walking into a room? Is it looking in the mirror and liking what you see? Is it buying a new shade of lipstick and feeling good?

Personally, I feel confidence comes with age and experience. In a world where we value youth over EVERYTHING. I tend to find the most confident people are older, wiser and calmer.

I find myself gaining more confidence and self- acceptance as I leave my adolescent years behind and venture off into my twenties. I am getting more assertive. I care less about other people’s opinions on my style or life choices. Yet, I still get insecure about everything from my looks to my writing abilities.

Confident people either make others around them feel good or insecure.

There is also a fine line between confident and cocky. We’re told to love ourselves but wait, don’t love yourself too much. No one likes a bragger or an ego filled maniac. Here’s looking at you Kanye.

Overall, I think no one is ever 100% confident all the time. If they appear to be they're wearing a mask. Confidence is all about small moments of feeling at peace with yourself. The trick is to try and capture those fleeting moments and continue to feel those emotions a little bit everyday.

My lovely readers, if you are feeling confident I beg you to spread your energy. Compliment a friend’s outfit or look a stranger in the eye.

The C-word- go ahead & say it loud.


  1. The trick is, if you don't have any, fake it. You gotta let others know that you're secure with yourself even if you're not.

    Just walk around always telling yourself you're good enough and you'll be headed straight to C-Town.

  2. i don't want to stick in my two cents but as a reader, i want to participate in your writing -- cause i really like your style -- so please, remove the word verification step for comments. you dont need it. i dont need it.

    also, if you make the comments appear in another box, we can reference the post while commenting which is very helpful. especially if there are photos or extraordinary points we'd like to go back to.

    please and thanks!

  3. i def lack in the confidence department :s

  4. there are days i have great confidence, and others i have not any. i am learning everyday to develop a greater sense of self though.